Words First: Archive

“Searching for yourself, in the dark, as you danced,
Floundering a little, crying softly,
Like somebody searching for somebody drowning
In dark water
Listening for them - in panic at losing
Those listening seconds from your searching -
Then dancing wilder in the darkness.” —Ted Hughes

“If you are desperate for a truth to hang on to, how ‘bout that we are not one way or another because we have been one way or another, but because we keep mistaking our past for our future.” —Karen Koenig

Jan 23, 20123 notes

#Karen Koenig

“I don’t want to express alienation. It isn’t what I feel. I’m interested in various kinds of passionate engagement. All my work says be serious, be passionate, wake up.” —Susan Sontag

It is unclear how I got here and why I am here and whose decision it was to have me here, but somehow I am commited (have been commited) to four more months (a final four months) here and we are all very hopeful it culminates in something fairly neat and prescribed.

Jan 21, 2012

#words

We are only ever alone, by which I mean, I am only ever alone, for what we could there be in this half empty bed?

Jan 21, 20121 note

#words

“‘I always want to know the things one shouldn’t do.’
‘So as to do them?’ asked her aunt.
‘So as to choose.’ said Isabel.” —Henry James

Jan 17, 20127 notes

#henry james #the portrait of a lady

Dawn

The answers I didn’t have last night did not show themselves this morning.

The conviction I didn’t have last night did not surface this morning.

The hope I didn’t have last night was still not found this morning.

Jan 17, 20121 note

#words

Things I should refrain from googling.

how to find a lost wallet in nyc

how to go to a bar alone

how to cook rice

calories in a tbsp of butter

best whiskey to use in whiskey sour

how to live

Jan 16, 20121 note

#words

Each time, after I remove myself from your bed, after I fumble with the lock on your front door, after I stumble myself down the steep staircase, I think about how I want to have sex with you again, about how it can be more exciting still than the last, about how every time should reach the heights of that one time. This must have to do with the newness. It must have to do with how, even though all I want to do is have sex with you, decorum states that we not spend every night together, because then this would be undeniably something, and we’re doing nothing.

Jan 12, 2012

#words

The Act Of

I’m not determining who I am very easily. Not who I will be or want to be, that has some kind of certain eventual-ness, but who I am now. How to fill my days in some defining way. How to connect this person to that eventual one. If you loved me it would be more easily determined. I would be someone. I would be the person you loved.

Jan 12, 20121 note

#words

I’m holding tight to this subject of mine and all her singular stagnating obsessions. Rearranging them, pressing and extruding them, believing that with further examination this subject may better resemble the object.

Jan 12, 2012

#words

“They still visited Ireland in the summer. The girls would sit in the barn’s hay loft, watching the horses have sex. A stallion would take on mare after mare. Anjelica’s friend Joan Buck noted, ‘Anjelica and I thought this was the way it went.’” —Ellen Copperfield on Anjelica Huston

Jan 11, 2012

#ellen copperfield #this recording

Falling in love with dancers.

I want all of that you posses to be mine too. I want all of that you share with others to be just mine in the evening.

Jan 10, 2012

#words

Words First

January 2012

15 posts